“Indecision may or may not be my problem.”-- Jimmy Buffett   I must admit that I love watching The Cupcake Wars while working out.  It’s a guilty pleasure.  In The Cupcake Wars, the pairs of contestants face bizarre themes, strange ingredients and, after making past the first two rounds, team members unknown to them.  The leader must direct her/his team in extremely short time periods in designing and ...

I recently was at a meeting where the woman who was conducting the meeting was very much like a High School cheerleader.  She bounced in the room, greeted us loudly, with great enthusiasm, and over-the-top gestures.  This didn’t sit well with me because we were there to make the solemn decision of who was to move up in the organization, who was to remain, and who might be removed from the organization.  It ...

I often share a story when I’m speaking of a time I had to cry.  I was humiliated, disappointed and frustrated.  Tears were my only release.  I went into a ladies’ room by myself and made sure that no one was around.  I sobbed my heart out.  After crying, I reminded myself that I was a leader, and I was going to go out there and lead, and no one would ever guess that I was boo-hooing.  I looked up at the ce ...

A San Francisco woman police officer responded to a call about a domestic disturbance.  Police officers dislike these calls because emotions run high, tempers flare, and the potential for violence escalates.  As she approached the house cautiously, she heard a man’s voice shouting angrily, and then a television crashed through a second-story window, smashing at her feet.  Without pulling her gun, she knocke ...

U.S. Army Major General John H. Stanford was asked about how one becomes a leader.  “When anyone asks me that question, I tell them I have the secret to success in life.  The secret to success is to stay in love.  Staying in love gives you the fire to really ignite other people, to see inside other people, to have greater desire to get things done than other people.  A person who is not in love doesn't real ...

Eventually you will be criticized in the workplace.  It may take the form of being screamed at, ridiculed, or sarcastically spoken to.  Not all bosses critique in a positive, helpful manner all the time.  When you face rude comments, you must show that you can handle it.  Women are especially susceptible to taking it personally, getting offended, and sometimes crying.  You worry and brood.  You obsess about ...

I have spoken to many women leaders and we have all had to deal with being called a bitch.  Although a cliché, it’s also true that assertive women often must cope with the name calling.  This article is about building the rapport so that your staff will not label you a bitch, nor permit anyone else.  I was in Thailand with the US Special Forces for Operation Cobra Gold in 1987.  At that time, women did not ...

One of the things I love about life is realizing something I did when I was younger led me to be able to do something when I was older.  All of us grew up playing Make Believe.  I was a teacher, soldier, princess, spy among lots of other things.  As children, we threw ourselves into the roles.  There was no self-doubt, fear, or lack of confidence.  This was playtime.  We played.  We believed. Now, I realize ...

In the seventies, I trained as an equal with men when I entered the Army.  I shot pistols, rifles, machine guns.  I drove a tank.  I threw grenades.  I fired light anti-aircraft weapons.  I fought back in war games.  I was part of the first group of women who were not WACs (Women Army Corps).  During my first two tours of duty, I only met two senior women officers.  In South Korea, as a second lieutenant, I ...